The Last Stretch

It's been a crazy couple of weeks.

There was Matric Dance (a disappointment, in my opinion. Perhaps if we hadn't been so late we would have been able to appreciate more of it. By the time we arrvied, everyone was already eating their starters. Apparently we also missed the letting-go of balloons, although here is no photographic evidence of such an event, so there remains a missing link...)

Always on my mind and in my heart.

I have dangerous love for this girl.

I love each and every one of these girls with my heart
and soul.

Paragliding in Cape Town.

A new camera (thanks dad).

Arts on Main

Blue Jean and T-shirt signing day at school

Tangaroa Strawberry Farm

Cocktails. (Life is hard, huh?)

Our last day of school - we come dressed up in our
preparatory uniforms.

Final assembly. The exec (leading student body at school)
sang and danced to Gangnam Style.

Matric breakfast.

Matric braai.

The last four pictures were all from yesterday - it was honestly one of the best days of my life. The assembly was amazing and trust me, usually the matric assemblies aren't. Usually they are rushed, unorganized and as a whole, not very good. I am not being biased, but our assembly was a huge success. It was funny, talented, organised and emotional. It included everything. I am really proud of this grade and I love them with my whole heart. These are the kids I have grown up with since I moved to South Africa in 2004. I have a hard-drive full of old pictures of us looking awkward and gawky - in the stages of growing up. I have tons of pictures of us now, grown-up and self-assured. These are the kids I have spent every day with for the past eight years of my life. I will never forget them. I have shared the happiness memories with him. I am going to miss them like crazy.

Another big thing that has happened recently was the break-up between Johnathan and I. It was tough, but it was necessary. I'm finding happiness in other things and it is, surprisingly, easier than I thought it would be. That's probably because my day-to-day life hasn't changed - I never used to see him because of the distance, and I still don't. The only thing that has changed is that we don't talk. I love him. I will always love him. I have never shared so much of my life with one person, and I probably won't for a long time. I'm ready to make the next few years about myself - to love and respect myself and to find myself in all sorts of unfamiliar places. Perhaps if the future is kind, I can continue sharing my life with him. I don't have any expectations. I have hopes and thoughts, certainly, but no expectations. I am luck to be someone who has always found it easy to be happy - I don't know why. I am probably one of the most positive people you will ever know. For now I am grateful to have shared a part of my life with someone that made me grow so much and gave me so many new views on life. He challenged me on a daily basis. If you're reading this baby (for not feeling comfortable in calling you anything else), I love you. I hope you are smiling.

I wrote more than I thought I would. I expected this to be a very rushed post because I have my Valediction tonight (my South African graduation) - in forty-five minutes actually.

Mom and Dad leave to Zimbabwe tomorrow. Mom comes back on Sunday and so my sister and I are alone for a few days. I shouldn't be excited to say this, and I'm not proud of it either, but I'm so undomesticated - I can't emphasise that enough. In Cape Town I had to go buy socks and I ended up coming home empty-handed because like... where do you buy socks? I can't grocery shop either. I'm lazy to make food for myself. I have no motivation to study for finals which start in six days. This is going to be a fun few days. I don't doubt I'll be blogging when I'm avoiding studying to fill you in on the chaos that has reigned in the O'Neill household.

Wish me luck!

I am nothing special of this, I am sure. I am just a common man with common thoughts. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But I've loved another will all my heart and soul, and to me, that has always been enough.

- Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

and because I have a few different emotions towards this post...

You do not need to be loved - not at the cost of yourself. The single relationship that is truly central and crucial in life is the relationship with the self. Of all the people you will know in a lifetime, you are the only one you will ever lose.

- Jo Coudert

and one more...

Did you say it? "I love you. I don't ever want to live without you. You changed my life." Did you say it? Make a plan. Set a goal. Work towards it. But every now and then, look around, drink it in 'cos this is it. It might all be gone tomorrow.

- Greys Anatomy

The first three photo's were taken by Lauren Mitchell. She takes the most stunning photo's. I'm in love with them. You can find her Facebook page here.