Ambiguity towards the Internet and Blog and Anniversary Madness

I really should disconnect my MacBook, iPad and all other electronic devices from my wi-fi during exam season or get my mom to change our password, but, *scoffs*, who am I kidding?

I get these things which I like to call exam-frenzies, when I spend hours on the internet, jumping from blog to blog, and falling in love with so many people and their stories. These frenzies, as hunky-dory and as heart-warming as they are, really don't come at the best of times. They don't come before exams start, or after, but instead, smack-bang in the middle of them. It's probably because I wrote the worst maths exam of my life today, and now my brain is rejecting any sort of mental involvement with academics, but I have an english exam tomorrow, and so I'm not stressed and I can allow myself this one day of debauchery.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, if you would look to your right, you will see A MILLION NEW BLOG BUTTONS I HAVE ADDED TO MY PAGE BECAUSE OH MY GOODNESS THIS MADNESS WILL NEVER END!

I also added my button - my very first! Glory glory. But, seriously, go check out the new blogs I've linked to. I only link the best of the best - the ones I fall in love with.

In other news, it is my second year anniversary next month with my heart and soul. Again, very hunky-dory, until I tell you my dilemma. For our first year anniversary, I got him a chain with a ring on it. For our year-and-a-half-anniversary, I engraved the ring. I've cooked him low-carb cookies for his birthday because he was on the Atkinson's Diet. I've thrown him a surprise party. I've made him a collage. I've bought him books, and tons of Manchester United things (his true love, you understand). I really should have done what he did, and started small with the presents and then worked my way up, but, no, I like to go all out. ALL THE TIME. Until now. Now I have absolutely no idea what to do. There is also the tiny fact that our second year anniversary is also SMACK-BANG in the middle of exams, and so we won't be spending the day together.

**cue: heart sobs**

If anyone has any ideas, feel free to throw them around in the comments below. Key words, even. I don't care. I'm very creative. Give me a thread and I'll create a masterpiece. You know, if I do say so myself.

Thank you, lovely humans. All my love.

If you're the Smartest Person in the Room

I make a point to surround myself with people who challenge me on a daily basis. Just like that quotation, "if you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room."

A couple of years ago, I remember my mom telling me about an article she read on Sandra Bullock who spoke of the same thing - "Always choose people who are better than you. Always choose people that challenge you and are smarter than you. Always be the student." I don't know if I formed the basis of my opinion and growing-self on what my mom told me that day, but I stand behind her belief and strong in my own belief. There is so much to know and learn from the world. There is so much about history, current affairs, culture and the world in general that you will never know, because life is too short and there is far too much information out there. That saddens me, but if I can make a point to better myself as much as I can, and learn as much as I can in my short time here on earth, then I will be content.

I find that, sometimes, we don't realize that we are standing next to one of the greatest people on earth. One of the best things about being at one school for so long, and finishing school with the same group of people, is that you one day find that one of your first friends in grade four turned out to be one of the most challenging, deepest people to ever stand beside you. You can hardly believe that that kid then, is this adult now. It astounds me.

This reverie is for a purpose. One of my dearest friends, Busang Senne, wrote a blog post a couple of days ago that I just read this morning. I am still sitting here in wonder, and I just had to share it because it is one of the most beautiful things I have ever read. It is beautiful in every sense of the world.

You can find her blog post here.

The Best and The Worst - The Last Days

Spring is on its way. I have been lying in the sun for the past couple of hours and I can't tell you how heavenly it is. I've come indoors to blog a bit before going out into the sun to carry on studying, and I'm beginning to feel a bit sleepy, lying here on my bed. Nevertheless, it has been the best part of my day, apart from having my matric dance dress delivered (*wiggles bum*) and going shopping for shoes. It was all very glitz-y glamour this morning, and mom and I finished off with iced coffee's and cinnamon sticks at Cinnabon.

Despite recent family issues, and the hardest exams of the year just about the corner, life is beautiful at the moment. I am happy, focused and full of life which is more than I can say for myself this time last year - quite the opposite actually. I am the luckiest girl in the world to have the life that I do. I have the most heart-warming family, the best boyfriend and the most life-changing friends who I am going to miss so much next year.

We should always turn towards the thoughts and choices which create, not destroy, and so, speaking of next year - I finally have an apartment and I am moving into it, together with my very first best friend all the way back in grade one when I still lived in Zim. Who knew? The course I am doing next year is fantastic. It has everything from fitness and nutrition, to public speaking and marketing. I have been accepted and have put down my deposit for it.

Although the academic part of school leaves much to be desired at this point with my first exam on Friday - History paper one - it has still been some of the best couple of weeks of my life, and will continue to be even better. I had my last two drama practicals exams - ever - last weekend. I love performing and it gives me an elated, soulful feeling that I haven't gotten from anything else before, but it was definitely time to lay it to rest.

We had our forty-days last week Tuesday which was awesome. It marked our last forty days of high-school classes and the entire grade came dressed up to the theme "what I want to be when I grow up". It's also a day during which we let go a bit - for example, five matrics drove their cars onto the field, and one drifted. Mind you, they did get in trouble and were sent home. Apparently someone has been suspended from our Matric Dance, but such stories like to make their way around our school from time to time. I went as a fairy because when I was a young, wee thing, my mom used to leave us notes as "our fairy" that we used to reply to. We learned that everyone had their own fairy that was there to look after them until they grew up. I dare anyone to tell me that I don't have the best mom. It worked until I realised my fairy's writing was exactly the same as my mom - just one thousand times smaller.

Class of '12.

A baby (never wanted to grow up - geddit?) and a nun.

Two babies, and Barney. Fitting.

Me and Minnie (Mickey?) Mouse. (I was a fairy)

The five-heroes of August the fourteenth.

How To Get Out Of Maths Class 101.

A baby, and a fairy. 

This weekend I went away for my sister's sixteenth birthday - just for the one night. We didn't go far - we just went to the Lion Park which is not far from where I live at all. It was a nice change, and something to experience - perhaps a part of Project Joburg, but I wouldn't officially say so.

I also watched The Devil's Advocate with Al Pacino. If you haven't seen it... go. Right now!

I hope you see things that stop you. 

I hope you feel things that you've never felt before.  

I hope you live a life that you are proud of and if you find that you are not, 

I hope you have the strength to start all over again. - Eric Roth

The Beauty of Tragedy

I saw a post on 9GAG the other day - and yes, I do realize that this is the umpteenth time I've started a train of thought with the words "I saw this post on 9GAG..." - which questioned why so many Marilyn Monroe quotes are used by so many girls in this day-and-age. 

The argument stated that she doesn't have any remotely inspiring attributes about her, and this was the substantiation: she was depressed most of her life, she died of a drug-overdose and she had affairs with multiple men. While I can understand where this argument is coming from, I don't think she is  frequently quoted because these are admirable factors that we have learned about the story of her life. I think she is quoted because of the beauty behind her tragedy.

I find myself drawn to the story of this 20th century persona in particular, yet I am far from popping lines of drugs, having affairs with married men and spending my day-to-day life depressed. If we think of the world, what do we find ourselves and our neighbors looking towards the most? Tragedy. Given examples can be as old as Romeo and Juliet to the present-day Heath Ledger life-story.

Why is the world like this? I cannot say. Is it because we find comfort in the sadness of the world? Are we eager to take on such an idea because it betters us? Do we do it for selfish reasons?

Whatever the conclusion is drawn from, I have to step back and reject the idea that there is idiocracy found in the fact we find such tragedies inspiring enough to follow in such paths. It is simply the beauty behind these people and their stories that stand out among the rest.

More Emotions!

If you have been recently finding a trend in my posts along the line of posting when not really sure how to feel or what to do about feelings or lack thereof... then you're right! It will go away soon though, I'm sure. I said I'm sure.

Firstly, I just want to put it on the table that my boyfriend thinks I'm a cry baby. (That was my way of telling you that I do tend to be a bit emotional sometimes and when I hear touching stories I don't express my feelings like a man). Yesterday I cried because I was reading articles on Chad Le Clos from South Africa (wooo! Viva South Africa!) beating Michael Phelps in the 200 meter butterfly of the Olympics last Tuesday. Michael Phelps has been Le Clos's hero since he was barely past puberty. It was his dream to beat him in a race - his life dream. I'm going to be outright pessimistic in saying this but how many people can say that they have accomplished their life dream? We all have one, and that actually means we're human, but who takes that step to go out there and accomplish their dream?

I'd like to play for the USA's water polo team. Do I play water polo? No. Do I live in America? No. Do I have a passion for water polo? Dude, I've never even played it. This is an open problem of mine though. I literally want to do everything and anything to the point that it is impossible to do any of it. Yet, here is a twenty-year-old kid from South Africa, and millions of people all over the world bore witness to his life dream being met. I'm getting teary eyed just reading more articles for this post.

This must be what pure happiness looks like.

I'm cry baby with a cause, no?

In other news, I just watched Jenna Marbles's My Boyfriend Does My Make-Up Tag video and I just have to do this. I don't wear make-up - not any but I pretty much only wear eyeliner, and a daily moisturizer with a tint. And mascara - but only when I go out. It might be a bit tricky, but I'll throw in some other fancy stuff just for the occasion. I haven't even asked his permission, but I'll put up the video after I've next seen him.

Adios, motherfluffers!