One of the people I turn to in life is my uncle. I'm been speaking to him a lot about my life, my future, and the journey through life with all its dark times and happy times. He sent me an email a couple of days ago that I just had to share a part of it. It's full of wisdom, intellect, experience and complete sincerity.
I was also amazed / proud of your thinking around finding yourself on your OWN terms. Again, you are wise beyond your years as not everyone has the clarity of thought to even do this / realise this is something we need to do. We live in a society where we have a desperate need to be 'accepted' (naturally, no great surprise there) - the hassle is that we sometimes needlessly 'take on board' things that we believe will get us accepted more readily. Problem is that we do this unconsciously pretty much all the time and over a long period of time. Then one day you open your eyes and realise you might have been sleep walking through your life and you have (somehow) gotten in to a position where you are living by a certain set of ideals that aren't yours and don't fulfil your spirit / being. Life has taught me that there are no absolutes really and that your character is very much shaped by the society and set of circumstances around you - simply put the person you are now will NOT be the person you are in ten years time, life will have changed your thoughts, people will have challenged your ideas and ideals and you will have been moulded. All that said, before you leap out into the bigger and wider world spending time working out who you are, what your values are and how you want to live your life is VERY important. If you are able to come up with your defining broad level principles you will be able to make better informed decisions further down the road that mean you remain true to yourself.
I understand too your desire to get on out into the world and give it a good shake - after all that is where all the action is! I absolutely guarantee you there are a myriad of possibilities, countless different avenues you can journey down and lovely / weird / downright strange people you will meet. You will find so many versions of 'the truth' as there are as many 'realities' as you care to imagine. Now, linking to the above paragraph, if I was ever to offer up some advice it would be, before you set off on that next adventure, spend quality time defining what YOU want to get out of life and what you want YOUR life to look like. Spend time to define it broadly, take on views and opinions of wise people around you and come up with a 'road map' that kind of sets out your path to achieving your goals, dreams and aspirations. One goal might be to be a University graduate and to do something amazing in the world of medicine etc. Once you have all that broadly defined, and as you set out and meet all these different realities / people / ideas you merely have to refer to your 'road map' to ensure you remain 'true' to yourself. I took much longer than one year's 'gap' between high school and training as a finance person - and I can't tell you how many paths I ventured down in that time. In some ways it was a miracle I actually came back to train up to do something other than just following my nose. Some of those who I journeyed with in that particular period of life didn't choose to train up further - they seemed happy to go where ever it was that the wind seemed to blow them. In my opinion that was not the wisest decision as, in choosing that approach, you aren't REALLY in control of your destiny. I still know a few of them and they are the first ones to admit that they messed up on the opportunities they had earlier in life.
I smiled at you saying that you are in the middle of your glory years... I view is that I am (now) in the middle of MINE (albeit at the advanced age of 40!). Made me realise that perhaps there is no specific time in life that can be considered true 'glory' years but perhaps the answer is - or the challenge should be - to ensure we live the WHOLE of our lives as one long 'glorious life'! How amazing it must be to be able to get to the end of our allotted time on earth, to look at yourself in the mirror and say "I became all I could be"...
Do you remember a Kings of Leon song (song was 'The Immortals') that I asked you to listen to when you were here for Xmas last year (doubt you will)?? I asked you to listen to it because the words are challenging you to pretty much what you (and I) have been writing about in the last few emails. In essence they are about finding out who you are 'face to face' (my interpretation of that line is that finding out who you are in not something you do in your posse of friends, it is something you do in the mirror - by yourself) and being prepared to wade into life to the fullest extent.
Anyway, the lyrics are pasted below - read 'em through, listen to the song then get out there into the world, make good decisions, don't be afraid to make mistakes and become all you can be.
I would not trade my family for anything. They make me a better person, and always remind me that I am never alone. I have the greatest bunch of people walking right by my side. Because of them, I know love and life.
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